Famous Lives, Forgotten Lines | The Life of Lauren Bacall

Lauren Bacall was the Hollywood golden star of the silver screen. She had the scorching signature look of bold arched brows that she never tweezed, perfectly wavy dirty blond hair that she styled herself, and red lips that spoke some of the most iconic lines in film history. There was a husky yet tender tone to her voice that captivated audiences. But her stories as an author possessed just as much passion and danger as her femme fatale roles. 

In By Myself and Then Some, Lauren’s sophomore memoir to her original National Book Award memoir, Lauren shares her journey into becoming a beloved and acclaimed actress in the Golden Age of Hollywood. But she also reveals intimate details of her behind the scenes life, featuring what many say to be the most epic true love story with her frequent costar Humphrey Bogart and what it was like losing her soulmate while she had to continue living on with her partner’s absence. Despite the personal and business hardships that ruled her life, Lauren wore a crown of dignity and resilience through it all. 

Even in her writing, there is a prominent sense of tough strength that came from her experiences with marrying and losing two alcoholic partners, being a single mother of three, and fighting for her spotlight in films and on Broadway. None of her losses are romanticized in a Hollywood type of glamour or facade. Instead, Lauren is devastatingly raw and upfront about her grief and still manages to have hope. 

The quotes below were written by Lauren Bacall to expand upon the themes and stories of her first memoir. As an actress and writer, Lauren maintained her integrity and image, encouraging readers to never waver their own ideals because of the critics in their lives. 

“Imagination is the highest kite that can fly. When you have nothing but dreams, that’s all you think about, all that matters, all that takes you away from humdrummery.”

“Childhood anxieties, childhood fears never disappear entirely. They fade, but not away.”

“All this came from wanting so desperately to be someone – something; to have my own identity, my own place in life. The best thing about dreams is that youth holds on to them. I was always sure mine would come true – one of them, anyway.”

“I find that through the sad times, work is what made my continuing, not breaking down, possible. In work, I was always someone else and I subconsciously reveled in that. I literally could not be me – I was back reading those fairy tales with a blanket over my head. Holding a flashlight on the book so my mother would think I was asleep. The fairy tales were my reality, especially during Bogie’s last few months – from rising at 6:00 a.m. to heading home after 6:00 p.m. I thought I was dealing intelligently with everything – conversations made sense, being with my children made sense – yet I was out of it. We were playing a game with the grim reaper ever present.”

“Just because he was my father – an accident. He’d contributed nothing to my life except anxiety. Why did I feel obligated in some way? One night I thought I saw the outline of a man in the audience who might be him, but I never knew for sure. I’d never be ready for that meeting, never know what to say, even what to feel. You can live your life – be responsible, bring up children – and still be totally unprepared to face a stranger who happens to be your father.”

“I had lost the last of three men who had changed my life. Bogie, Charlie, and Adlai – the three men who had contributed most to my growth. There would be no others like them to love, no others to bring about radical change in what and how I felt, saw, and thought. But each had left me with such richness! I would refer to them – each of them – for the rest of my life.”